How to Process Emotional Pain
The Emotional Pain. We all go through seasons in life, some of which are exciting and joyous, and others that are painful and emotionally hard. These difficult moments are hard to accept and often really hard to process, but they are a normal part of life that we have to learn how to deal with in order to lower our stress levels and protect ourselves from harm.
When I say harm, I mean the harm this emotional pain and stress can cause to our bodies. It’s not uncommon to start feeling literally sick and physically weak during hard times, and it’s because our entire body, including the immune system, is fighting to keep us healthy. Processing emotional pain helps us strengthen our immune function and balance out our hormones while promoting growth, self-love, and in the end, teaching us how to move forward.
It’s also important to learn how to process emotional pain for your own mental health, making you realize that life has its challenges and that it brings only what we can handle, even if it doesn’t feel like it at times. Processing is healing, in every sense of the way, so don’t sweep your emotions and pain under the carpet, and find the best way to deal with it. Here are some great steps you can take to start your healing journey and come out of it stronger, healthier, and in the end, with a greater understanding of who you are.
Acknowledge Your Emotional Pain
First and foremost, it’s important to acknowledge and even respect your emotional pain. It’s not a weakness or embarrassment to feel these deep feelings, no matter the reason behind them. Whether you’re hurting because of a failed relationship or injustice, it doesn’t really make a difference. Your emotional pain is real and it’s wreaking havoc on your mental and physical state.
Acknowledge that it’s there, give it space to exist, and allow it to expand to its limits, so you know how much you need to work on. Don’t diminish it or think you’re overexaggerating, no one can tell you how you’re supposed to feel. And on that note, really listen to the next tip.
Remove Toxic People From Your Life
When you’re dealing with a lot of emotional pain, it’s only natural to want to talk to others in hopes they will listen to you and maybe even offer advice and help out of the situation you’re in. See, the problem with this is there are plenty of people who might offer their advice but can’t really understand what you’re going through as they haven’t gone through it themselves. And more often than not, that advice turns into judgment, which in return only makes you feel worse and results in closing in.
Additionally, some people in your life might even be toxic and intentionally try to make the situation worse by giving unsolicited advice. Don’t share your struggles with toxic people, and don’t allow them to rattle your foundation even more. In order to really heal and come out stronger, you need to know that whatever you’re going through deserves its value and space, and these kinds of people will do anything to bring you down.
It might not easy to distance yourself from negative people and those who really cannot understand what you’re going through, especially in the very beginning. But, over time, you will slowly start to realize who your true friends are, who actually want to help you, and who you’re better off without.
Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
Another important tip in learning how to process emotional pain is to not compare yourself to others. Everyone is different and everyone goes through their own personal struggles, believing and feeling all that goes with it 100%. Sometimes you might see someone’s problems and think “Wow, they have it much worse,” or “They couldn’t possibly understand what I’m going through, their life is perfect.” In reality, you can’t really know what someone is going through and even less, how it reflects on their emotional health.
That person you believed has it much worse might be dealing with it much better than you think, and the “perfect life” someone else is portraying might just be a facade they’re putting on so it seems better to others. Don’t compare yourself to anyone and always look at your own situation from all possible angles. There’s only one of you and no one can feel your feelings and experience your emotions.
Talk to a Professional Emotional Pain
Sometimes we all need a little bit of extra help. That’s not to say we’re incapable of dealing with our personal struggles alone, but sometimes it might be a bit too hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. That’s why there are people who have turned their lives into a career of helping others find their path and process their emotional pain.
It’s not an admittance of defeat or failure if you decide to go to therapy, it’s actually the best possible step you can make if you feel like your pain is too much to handle. Sometimes all you really need is for someone to listen to you, without judgment, without bias, and even without close friends who can’t really understand what you’re going through but only want to distract you to make you feel better.
Focus on Love and Forgiveness
At the end of the day, if you don’t focus on forgiveness and instead look for ways to get revenge, you’re only hurting yourself. Focus on love and forgiveness as it’s the only way to move forward and stay healthy in the process. That being said, it’s ok to prevent the people who hurt you from being in your life, but forgiving them is not for them, it’s solely for you.
You’ll feel so much better when there are no grudges to hold, apologies to expect, and even hopes for things to be different and for people to change. You can only influence so much in your life, and everything starts with you.
Let it go. Simple as that. But not so simple, isn’t it? You have to remind yourself every day that “this too shall pass,” and that you’re so much stronger than you think you are. You were placed on this Earth to be yourself and grow with every challenge and obstacle. Everything that comes your way, you can handle. Believe in yourself, be courageous, make the step, be resilient, and push forward. One step at a time, one day at a time.
Everything in this life happens, people face suffering and emotional pain, moving forward and surrounding yourself with the love of your loved ones is the strength to move forward, do not give up this will happen and you will win this battle God bless you and your family.